We often leave our happiness up to fate. Just think about your day today.
You may have arrived at work to be greeted by the boss who ushered you into her office. If she complimented your efforts and gave you a raise, you danced through your day on top of the world.
But if the boss somberly relayed the words of an unhappy client who laid blame at your feet, then you are probably still grumbling to yourself as you read this. You are NOT happy at all today!
That may be an extreme example, but it’s typical of the way most of us allow outside factors determine our happiness. The words your spouse said as he left for work, the quality of the morning coffee, the state of your occasional back pain, your level of frustration with your financial situation – this and more comes together to determine what kind of day you’re having.
Understanding Fate and the Forces That Hold You Back
We often say an event is our fate. This can be meeting a special person, getting a job, or suffering an accident that changes everything. Fate is outside forces that control our lives in some way.
Many people believe you can’t fight fate. They will simply tell you to accept the forces in your life and move on. But free will can balance fate. It’s the ability to take forces in your own hands and determine your own outcomes. For those who learn how to do this, it can make a HUGE difference in what they achieve in life.
It’s Actually in Your Hands – Take Control of Your Happiness
Don’t feel alone. Nearly all of us leave our happiness up to fate. But we don’t have to. You can take control and have a happy day even if just about everything goes wrong.
Ultimately only YOU are in charge of your happiness. Nobody has the power to force their way into your brain and flip the unhappy switch. No matter what other people say or do, you can remain happy, determine your own emotions, and put fate on the sidelines while you have a very nice day.
Here are a few things you can do to make happiness easier to achieve.
Taking Slightly Risky Chances That Lead to Happiness
Like everything else in life, achieving happiness often requires a little risk. Talk to someone new, offer to help a neighbor, shop at a new store you’ve never tried before, laugh out loud, give yourself some needed alone time, spend a few minutes feeling grateful for people who have helped you.
Yes, these things can be risky. You might hate the new store, get rebuffed by the neighbor who doesn’t want help, and have the phone ring all through your alone time. But taking a chance on happiness almost always improves your outlook. Instead of placing your emotions in the hands of fate, you are proactively taking charge.
Stop Being So Hard On Yourself -You May Be Happier Than You Think
People who are chronically happy spend very little time thinking about their happiness. If you often stop to gauge whether you are happy, stop it now! Give yourself permission to simply be happy without critique. Silence that little voice that says you don’t deserve happiness, haven’t worked hard enough for it, or are only being deceived by the things that make you happy.
You are now in charge of your emotions. Put fate on the back burner and live your happy life to the fullest!
If this article resonates with you and you want to “Live Intentionally’ and ‘Think To Be Happy’ feel free to reach out, no strings attached. I can be reached at drcharles@thinktobehappy.com or (310) 689-4310 so take your chance.
Shawna Charles holds a MBA and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology. She is a certified mediator, parent coach and ‘ACTIONIST’ who motivates people to intentionally choose happiness. She teaches the power of confessing, creating and choosing happiness. She is also the creator and founder of ‘Think To Be Happy’. Dr. Charles loves what she does and who she is becoming and invites you to join her on this happy life journey.